TORN

Well I've had a fairly good day. My mood has been quite positive and I've been less snappy. I cut down my pain patches as planned. So far I do have more pain but it's not intolerable. I guess it'll hit in the next couple of days when there's less in system. Fingers crossed I will feel the energy return! I'm sick of living in a drug-fog.

G (dog) got a really long walk this morning and the sunshine was gorgeous. It's October and I was seriously wearing shorts and a vest top. How bizarre. Granted I walk fast to get my heart rate up and that warms me, but still, it was sunny and warm. Why can't every day be so pleasant?!

Food wise, hmmm. I feel guilty about what I ate today, I feel like it should be less. I want to lose a few pounds and right now it's pretty unrealistic. I properly exercised for the first time in ages yesterday and woke up aching. At the start of this year I was super fit, loved the gym and had a toned body and no love handles. Now although I am actually a lower weight, I have many squishy bits, so I'm gradually reintroducing strength training. I miss being toned and athletic.

Food today:

4 Weetabix
Small serve pasta with veggie sauce
2 Apples
Kiwi fruit
Sweets
Giant white chocolate cookie.

Not the end of the world. But not great, especially as I am trying to ward off a binge right now. I have a habit of stashing comfort food away when I'm restricting, which inevitably means when I finally crack and binge, I have heaps of my favourite foods to binge on. I am working on this...but for some reason I feel safe and secure with the food there, even if I never eat it. Bizarre!

Hope you all had a good day. It's nice to feel like this gets read and responded too. I am doing better at responding to others. When you have no impartial sounding board in everyday life, a blog is a good friend to have.